ANSWERS: 86
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I think you need to seriously re-consider this woman. If she doesn't want to marry you because the ring is not good enough then this relationship will not last. I'm sorry to have to be the one to inform you of this but your love for her may be blinding you.
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Go to stullers website - then get an account - your have to fake up some reciepts and get a businees account number. You will be able to buy that ring at 1/3 the cost of retail.
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It is not about the ring.. it is about the love. If she is consumed with having a huge rock, than you need to re-examine the relationship. One of my gal pals wanted a big rock... but they couldn't afford it, so they bought a really nice fake diamond. For their 10 year anniversary, he bought her the most beautiful diamond ring to replace the 1st one. They can afford it now. Talk to her. If she is insistant about the ring, her priorities are not in the right place.
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Well, I used to not care at all about the ring. Then, I realized that it was a symbol of how much the relationship meant to him. I mean, honestly, a $2000 ring says you are more important than a $200 ring does. A man who will find a way to buy a more expensive ring is willing to invest more into asking you. This can be important, and I learned it from experience. Having said that, if she wants you to spend 6 month's salary or some other craziness, that's also a problem that tells you where her priorities are. In that case, I agree with Valparaiso.
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she basically is saying that the ring is more important then the man she is going to marry it is not right....they didn't have rings in the stone ages why need rings now?
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Honestly, I'm the kind of girl that doesn't care about crap like that, because metal can tarnish, and diamonds can fade, but the promise that a ring really means, never goes away. The ring isn't about the rock, it's about THE PROMISE, and unfortunately, some girls, even guys, don't understand that. Get her the ring you want, don't worry about the cost, if she doesn't like it, then she isn't in it for the right reasons because it isn't about the ring.
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Lets face it, when a man and woman get married, its a very special occasion. the woman wants to shout it to the world, that she has met and is about to marry. mr. wonderful. And how does she share her joy with the rest of the world......THE RING! I can understand, that carrying a magnifying glass, just to see the diamond, could be embarrasing. after all, hopefully this will be the first and last marriage for both of you. Ever heard the song "With This Ring"? the song really tells it like it is. its what the ring signifies today and for the future. Its expensive, but a better ring is a good investment. something to last forever, just like your wedding. I did what you are going to have to do, if expect any peace, from your fiance....go in hock for a better ring, a ring she will proudly show to her family, friends, and maybe old boyfriends. you don't want to show your "lean-side", so do like 90% of men do, go in debt for the ring. The smile on her face will warm your heart, as she openly displays her engagement(and the ring) to the world. Its worth it.......believe me.....it is! P.S. there is another answer to your question, that just hit me. this is not a greed thing, is it?
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The truth is women don't...if they really love you! I don't know about her but that was a pretty mean and shallow thing to do. Can't believe she did that!!
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My Grandpa recently passed after 65 years of loving my Grandma. As long as I'd known, she'd always had a fabulous wedding ring. We were at the hospital before he died and I noticed my Grandma had this thin little wire on her finger. I asked her about it and she told me to look closer. That wire had tiny little flowers pressed into it, it was gold. They had gotten married during the depression and that was all Grandpa could afford (I guess these thin little bands were pretty common then as gold was expensive). Later, he got her a better set. But when he was sick and dying, she went back to her first ring, she told me she treasures it more than anything she owns. In his room was their wedding picture. He asked me if I knew what that picture was, of course I did, it was their wedding picture, he said no, that's my favorite picture on earth. Get the point? I haven't even met your girlfriend, but she doesn't sound like such a catch right now. The question you should ask is why do SOME women care so much about the ring, and should I be marrying one of them.
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am i girl but i dunno either why most girls loves rings with huge stones or glittering stones Oo.. for me what matter most is that my bf loves me to the deepest part of his heart and i love him same way.. rings or any material signs of love can be stole and fade... though to answer you question.. maybe some women feels that the more expensive your give is the more you love them.. :/ pathetic truth sometimes...
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If she isn't happy with it because she wanted a different shape or cut, oblige her even if it is a bit shallow. She should love you for going out and picking something just for her all on your own. But if she is wanting you to spend more money on a ring, run for your life! That is just a prelude to what she is really like. She will want all the best things in life and will break your bank account getting it.
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Not all women are like that. If it is that important to her to have a ring that costs a lot of money before she trusts you, I'd say that at best she has serious issues with trust, and at worst she is being greedy, avaricious. From other comments you've made I think it is the latter. It is a very bad sign too that you cannot discuss it with her. Is it too late to just dump her and find someone nicer? I don't think she is the one for you if her priorities lie in such different places from yours. Sorry.
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She should be happy with what you can afford- can you really afford the better ring? This could be an indication of things to come, buddy! She sounds materialistic to me. What's next: uou get a car, she wants a better one, you get an apartment, she wants a better one, you get furnishing, she wants better ones. I hope you have a good job or a good career planned because this is going to cost you.
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I guess I'll just reiterate what's already been said by most people here: If she cares more about the ring than the fact you want to marry her... It is a very, very bad sign :/ Talk to her about it, if she really does insist, or seems somehow upset that she can't get this ring she wants... I really hate to say it but I don't think she feels the same way about you as you do about her :( If it was just a passing kind of comment "Oh I'd rather that one" or something, it's a bit nasty of her to say something like that, but it might not be anything serious at all :) Definitely talk to her more about it
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Perhaps a good compromise is to buy her a ring you can afford now with the promise of a "better" ring in the future. I don't get it. My wedding ring was second hand and cheap, but to my (now ex)husband it was a lot of money at the time and I appreciated that without complaining. He bought me a nicer ring a few years later. I am a woman and I don't care about how big or expensive the ring is as long as the person who bestows it upon me is "the one". Could she have cold feet and be using the ring as an excuse to stall? Just a thought. I also don't get how and why people spend so much on weddings either, but that's just me. Good luck.
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Have you ever heard of the expression "wrong ring, wrong man" Yes, some women do thing that way. The karat of the ring show how far would you go to prove that your love to her and how much is she "worth" to you. More importantly, it is about how well you know her! If you know her well, you would have known what she expect as an engagement ring and if you would love her that much you would want to fulfill her wish, no matter what. After all, this is "the ring" even you will replace it when you in a better financial situation but it won't be the same! So, now it is up to you whether you want to make her dream comes true or not! P.S. don't listen to all those comment about ring's size doesn't matter! They either cannot afford it or didn't get one from their BF!!!
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Bring back the ring and find another girl. She is obviously all about show. Making you work another year for a more flashy ring is totally selfish and wrong. The fact that she is making this kind of demand should be a clue that she is far too "high maintenance" for you.
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It must be a great answer for you. Why it must be a ring? Here is a answer..
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This picture is the answer for you.
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Everyone's making great points here but I wanted to ask if she had her heart set on a specific ring. If so, maybe you can find a less expensive one that is similar or even the same with a less expensive stone(s) with the promise to put in nicer stones some day. Personally my wedding ring and my husbands were very inexpensive ones that look nice, but the meaning is what truly matters to us.
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She doesn't sound quite mature enough yet for marriage. Why don't you guys wait to get engaged until you have more financial power. I mean, what's the rush? So many women are brainwashed by diamond industry commercials. They're led to believe that "bigger is better." When in fact, girls in Europe and Asia prefer a smaller rock of a better quality. You know, the four Cs of a diamond. The diamond industry have a saying "thank goodness for American girls" because without these girls, they can't get rid of their inventory of cloudy low grade rocks because a lot of American girls prefer size over quality. Just one carat of a really excellent grade diamond will set you back $35,000 while a not so good grade diamond will cost only $6,000. Something to think about, eh?
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Women that care about the size of the ring are whores. Quite litteraly. If she really loved you she wouldn't care if you got her one at all.
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Rent the movie "Blood Diamond" maybe she will change her mind about diamonds completely
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i can see where everyone is comming from about reexamining your relationship. it's a valid point for sure. personally though (i'm a girl) a decient rock is important to me. i admit it, i'm materialistic and i care about what stays on my finger for the rest of my life, especially if it represents somthing as important as a life long relationship. the time and hardwork that comes with affording more shows to me with actions their willingness- sincerity, self sacrifice and endurance. i've been called a princess, whatever, i am who i am.
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For me it wasn't the size of the diamond I cared about, but the setting. I told my husband what I wanted out of my ring and he delivered! I think that most women only want to be married once and they want that ring to be the perfect one they wear forever.
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why does she care so much about the ring? its not about the ring its about the 2 of you and how much you love each other. personally i think your gf is being selfish and if i was you she wouldnt even get the ring you got her in the first place.
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I hate to answer the question with a question but...How does it make you feel that she's made it clear to you that she wants a "better" ring? Have you and she discussed other issues re your impending marriage? Rings can symbolize many things...like what a great catch you are and how glad she is to be marrying you and how wonderful your life will be together. I think you should discuss this with her. How will she feel if you want to go with the ring you picked out?
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not all women care so much about the ring..I think the presentation is most important..romantic...my ring was very small, i'd say under 1,000. but i was happy about it.
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Speaking strictly from a woman's perspective, I'm thinking instead of shopping for a better ring, you need to be shopping for a better girlfriend! If she cares more about the size of the rock than about the size of your heart, why would anyone want to marry such a woman? Most young couples just starting out cannot afford a big rock and would be wiser to start out with a smaller stone and less debt, and as their finances change, maybe in ten years or so, the rock can grow in size to match the love in the marriage. If all she cares about is a big rock now, I'd say your marriage is doomed before you ever say "I do".
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Because that's her excuse not to marry you right now. And because some people are just shallow, selfish creatures that only care about apperarances. Take this as a sign and a red flag for your future. She's a high maintenance girl, and she will never STOP being a high maintenance girl. If you like it, proceed. If not, think carefully about what you are getting yourself into. This will NOT be easy.
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kinda off topic, but i recommend this book as a basic guide to diamonds. after you read it, you might be able to find one like it for less. i have also heard that buying loose online from a reputable website can also save you a whole lot. whatever you wish to do, good luck :) Diamonds--The Antoinette Matlins Buying Guide : How to Select, Buy, Care for Diamonds With Confidence and Knowledge
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I have been married for 20yrs now and I still have the same ring that he put on my finger it is not fancy and the diamond is small but to me there is nothing bigger or better he offered to buy me another set of rings for our 20th but I told him no because it would never feel the same so he came back from the store with a picture with a poem on it that read the ring upon your finger it shines as if brand new and every time i look at it I think of me and you. The rings we wear are solid and golden through and through just like the love inside my heart thats I've reserved for you. so can you say that she has that much love for you or the ring. true love can't be measured by a ring so if she really cared about you the ring you bought should have made her happy I hope you find the right girl for you that loves you for you but this one is not the one.
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Thats really not nice of her to say. She should accept what you can give her. What, the house not gonna be big enough, the clothes not enough to fill the closet? You need to rethink this whole thing as it points to a bigger problem.
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I hear girls at work talking about rings all the time, and they are all married or engaged to a**holes. If she is that worried about the ring, she doesn't appreciate what you bring to the table.
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My boyfriend has a part time job with a car payment and couldn't afford too much but we found a 1/4 tw three stone ring for $150 and it's perfect. It's not the ring, it's the reminder of someone who loves you.
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When that day comes I would be so happy and overjoyed with the person presenting the ring to me. He would be the most important person in my life, the ring would just be the icing on the cake.
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Not all women do.I have a very nice ring...that I almost never wear!It's strange how much work is put into getting the right ring and not on working on the relationship.
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It's a year later and I would venture to say that this "gold digger" has found someone else and moved on from this decent guy. I would love to know what happened.
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My ring was 10.53 carets from Tiffany and the reasons he wqansta nice ring is that she will have it her WHOLE LIFE by the ring that you get shows the kind of person you are my ring was of 70 thousand and it shows my husband and i work hard and we live "The Life"
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She is not happy with what you picked out, what else is she not going to be happy with. It is just jewellery, there are 1,000.000 more important things that actually deserve your "worry"
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Some people get money and love all twisted together as though to say if you spend MORE money on me that means you love me MORE. Which is a shame because if I am making all this money to buy you expensive stuff, when will I have time to spend with you? I personally think this stems from someone who had a parent that bought their kids love instead of mentally or emotionally being there for them. It manifests into an extremely materialistic lifestyle that fills the void.
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1) She's a bit materialistic, isn't she? 2) If she hadn't known beforehand, would she have demanded you get her a "better" ring? 3) If a marriage proposal requires a ring that will take you a year to get (and you already have one), why's SHE putting things off? You may want to rethink things! :-/
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I would re think your decision. It seems pretty materialistic and superficial to say she doesn't like the ring. The ring is hardly important when it comes to marriage, in my eyes anyway. Like anyone is going to think you don't love her or find her worth it if you dont get her the greatest ring. People didn't start being so picky about rings until the past decade. What do you suppose people did before? I find your girlfriend a little ridiculous... sorry.
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I would get her the ring......you don't want a cloud hanging over it when she's wearing it. Go ahead and schedule the year to pay for it too. This what sacrifices are all about.....Good luck
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Women care so much about the ring because : 1) They plan to wear it for the rest of their lives. 2) They want to show it off to everyone they know. 3) Some view the size as an extension of your feelings. Jewelry is very personal--an extension of the person. Some women are just fine with a smaller ring, while others want the largest they can get. Like the wedding, your girlfriend may have had certain ideas about what her ring would look like her whole life. Sorry if it's more than you wanted to spend, but if you plan to marry for life, you probably want to start out on the right track with the right ring--even if you have to wait a year.
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Dude, it's the ONE thing they've been waiting their whole life for! It might not seem this way to you, but it shows them just how much you really want her to be yours.
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my mum and dad got married at 18 and 19, because they unexpectedly got pregnant. At that age, dad couldnt afford a ring, so he got mum a very cheap argos ring. She was disappointed, but accepted and spent the next 18 years with this 25 dollar ring. Then one day, for her birthday, he replaced it with a diamond ring. She is still a bit skeptical about it, because its small, but diamonds are SO expensive, and if she were the one buying it...im sure she would be reluctant to get a big one aswell. I have an engagement ring on my finger, and its exactly what i want. My partner doesnt earn a huge amount, its white gold with cubic zirconia, which to me is far prettier than diamonds, it sparkles, it fits, its simple, and i know it hasnt caused my partner any financial difficulties. And more than that...it symbolises what we have together, and the commitment we have made. Materialism should play no part in that.
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I have to question her love for you. I was engaged without a ring and married for 35 years before my husband bought me a large ring. I decided a ring was not as important and investing in a home for both of us. The size of the stone does not indicate the degree of love. I'd be asking her why she needs such a large stone. If the answer doesn't make sense, make tracks out of there.
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Ugh, not all women do. She sounds a bit picky and materialistic... it's just something you spend money on. If the amount of money you spend on somebody defined the love you have for them, I'd have no friends or boyfriend because I'm broke as hell.
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If you want to marry a girl who wants a better ring, then I believe each of you would be making a poor choice to stay together. I would dump her fast.
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The ring is bragging rights to her friends and acquaintances. The larger the stone the more they can brag. Thats terrible that she did not like the ring you picked out. She ought to be thankful that someone was thoughtful enough to pop the question and buy her a ring. Be careful with that one. Thats a huge red flag dude.
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I don't think you're girlfriend realizes that it's NOT the ring that makes the marriage...or the wedding dress...or the reception...or the house you buy, etc., etc., etc. On the flip side, there are women who get angry when their husbands don't wear their wedding ring. Again, it's NOT the ring that makes the marriage. If my boyfriend bought me a ring out of a bubble gum machine and proposed with it, that would be fine. What he would be asking for is my hand in marriage - a lifelong commitment to be with me - not for his approval over a measly ring. Likewise, if my husband chose not to wear his ring...who cares? It's a ring. If I need the security of a wedding ring on his finger to make me feel good, then the ring is far from the root of the problem. I advise you to reconsider your choice of girl here. If you lost everything but the clothes off your back tomorrow, would she stand by you?
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if you're not willing to make an extreme sacrifice in buying her a ring, then, in the future (e.g., after W-Day), you might not be willing to make the supreme sacrifice so that she can enjoy bon-bons.
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Not all women do. When I got married my husband and I had very little money and we paid for our own wedding rings, simple gold bands. We were not going to have an engagement ring as we couldnt afford it, but he bought a very simple small sterling silver ring with a garnet in which is my favourite stone. He got down on his knees in the middle of the city center and proposed to me and gave me the ring. The way he did it was more important to me than the ring. Frankly, I don't really like rings and have not worn my engagement ring nor my wedding ring for most of my married life, which is over 23 years now. I would say if she is this expensive already how will she be when you are actually married?
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Do not react too quick to the advice above. You already know what kind of person she is. If you know her to be good but this ring thing has you confused then know this... Something has happened in her life that may make her feel shy to wear the smaller ring. It is a big thing to some perfectly good people. Ask her if she would rather a large Cubic to wear till you can afford to replace it with a real diamond. Ask her if it is what others think that bothers her. She already knows what you can afford so it is not about how much you love her. On the bad news side... she could simply be trying to delay the wedding and it is ok not to be sure. Good luck!
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I got DR'd for this?? PLEASE!! DR all you want. Are you feeling better now you sweet little troll?? I certainly hope so. Have a pleasant day!!
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I don't think it's all about the ring. My boyfriend is all stressed out because he wants to get a really nice 2.5 carat engagement ring but we are trying to save for a house by next year as well so I suggested that i really don't care so much about having diamonds and what really matters is that we love each other (i know it sounds cheesy) and we want to stay together for the rest of our lives. Rings are merely symbols.
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I don't think women do. I have a nice little engagement ring. My David picked it out for me over 25 years ago. He's suggested once or twice that he should get something bigger now. I wouldn't give this ring up for a 10 karat stone. I love it because it came from him and I know that he had to save to buy it and that he agonized in picking it out just for me. I've never understood women who want to take that away. It's not about the "perfect" ring. It's about the man. The fact that he chose it for me makes it perfect in every way.
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i'd get an affordable ring today and if she's still with you in 10 years, buy her an expensive ring then. i hate it when materialism clouds love. good luck!
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Wow are you sure you really wanna marry her??? That is insain it has nothing to do with the damn ring it has to do with what the ring means and what you are asking of her! I would maybe take a step back and think real hard about what you are getting yourself involved with there sorry
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ok my friend, if your girl wants a better ring BEFORE I SAY BEFORE BECAUSE I MEAN BEFORE you get married i'd be puttin' that B on the curb.. there is no reason whatever 3 months pay ring you picked out isn't good enough. you prolly got an awesome ring and she's just a selfish #$#@%$#@ ANYWAY either your stupid for being with her or she is playing you real smart... good luck.. P.S. the woman shouldn't give good golly about that ring if she loves you homie..put her to the curb.. girls care about rings who don't care about they're man..don't put that p on the pedastil bro..
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Women care about rings because it's a symbol of a man's ability to provide for her financially in the future. Respectfully listen to her preferences, but let her know what your limits are, and that if she really wants this ring, she'll have to wait at least a year to get it. Did she really want you to buy a more expensive ring, or did she just point out a different style that she liked better? Because those are two different attitudes.
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I can't believe the ring you got her wasn't good enough for her. When I get married, I'm not going to care what the engagement ring looks like, as long as it was picked out of love and it's from him. I agree with some of the other people who answered, reconsider this woman.
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wow... that is rude! If she cares so much about the ring that maybe she is not for you ! If you cant afford it and she is shaming you for it ..... tell her to buy her own damb ring!
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Going to agree with everyone here...if you are considering marrying a woman who wants a better engagement ring than the one you can provide for her...then you shouldn't be marrying her.
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So that when she kicks your ass, she has a more expensive ring to keep
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If she doesent like it then shes not the one for you. It depends on whats in the bank account!
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I gave my wife a ring made by my brother-in-law that was given to my mother who in turn gave it to me to give to her! So it meant something to all of us! She loved it now just to let you know we are simple folk that don't bother worrying about the latest and greatest! I would not marry her unless you can afford to always get the "better" one!
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I would be willing to bet that nothing is going to be "good enough" for this one. She is always going to want better. If she is unhappy with the ring you chose (or could afford) it just shows that material things are first and foremost with her. Most women are happy with the thoughts and sentiments behind the ring, not the ring itself.
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How pathetic of her.
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I never cared about the ring at all. actually I never saw the ring until he asked.
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if my bf wanted to marry me the ring wouldn't matter, it could be a five dollar plastic one and i would wear it; because i love him. you might want to think about marrying her if she is so consumed about the ring.
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She sounds extremely selfish; and she doesn't deserve that ring.
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Okay, this question is a year and a half old. What I want to know is did you go through with it and how is the marriage going if you did?
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They care about the ring so they can hold it up and show off which i suppose you can't blame them ,alittle,,,,,compare to their friend's rings . This is one thing for an engagement ring though you may want to decide if it will be for other things that you can't afford once you give her this big ring ,,, Like Waylon Gennigs sang ,,keepin up with the Jone's a 4 car garage and still building on ,,
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Did you pick out a plastic cracker ring? If so I can understand her wanting something better. If you picked out a "proper" engagement ring, and it aint good enough for her, then she aint good enough for you mate.
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The ring shouldn't matter, what should matter is that she is marrying you and that she loves you! But seeing that this is almost 2 years old, I would like to know how it went.
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Women don't. Spoiled, selfish little girls do. Maybe you should be rethinking this. I wouldn't exchange the ring my husband picked for me for the Hope diamond.
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I don't know. It would seem to me that the promise of a lifetime of love and devotion would make a ring seem worthless. I'd be very concerned that you aren't the prize she's been looking for. Personally I'd reconsider, as painful as it would be. Sorry for your troubles. I hope everything turns out for the best.
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First off, she's going to wear this ring for the rest of her life, with EVERY outfit-- so she better like it. There is nothing wrong with being honest and saying "i dont like it". Now as far as the SIZE and COST- everyone wants to say that she is a bad girlfriend and doesn't love you, but in all honesty, society places this huge importance on a BIG RING. Its stupid. Its all marketing from the diamond companies. It started in the 1800's. Around that time, Victorian culture was busy assigning abstract concepts to material objects. In the 1930s, De Beers set out to establish social status for large diamonds through giving a number of starlets hefty stones for photo shoots and script-doctoring Hollywood movies to include scenes of jewelry shopping. The tradition began to be manipulated more closely in one particular aspect–the act of giving. Go hear to read more on this: http://74.125.47.132/search?q=cache:ZPT76yZr_d8J:www.ibiblio.org/pub/electronic-publications/stay-free/archives/16/diamonds.html+diamonds+and+marketing&hl=en&ct=clnk&cd=1&gl=us&client=firefox-a I think she's interested in "keeping up with the Jones'" more than anything else. I don't necessarily think it means she doesn't love you or that she is greedy. But, it is a good sign of what marriage will be like when you decide to make financial decisions together. Is she going to pressure you to spend out of your means? Cars, clothes, trips, kids, etc. I think you should sit down and have a financial talk TOGETHER and assess your fiances. It would be a good idea to know her thoughts on debt, budgeting, saving, investing, etc. Otherwise, you will be in for a rough ride, considering money is one of the top reasons for divorce.
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Give her what you think you want /can spend ...if she don't like it ,,? keep the receipt ,,,or your blackbook .
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If that ring is more important to her than you making a lifelong commitmnet to eachother, Please ask her what are her intentions on you guys being married. And I think it not traditional for the future bride to pick out her own ring. BE smart& Safe.
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I believe that this girl is high mentainace and she will ask for more and more in the future and you will still have same problem. she will ask about a diamond watch and the earing that matches the mink fur ...etc. I have afriend and she just married a guy for the big rock that he gave her and she told me that she is planning to stay with an ex boyfriend and cheat on him but she want that ring. I am not saying that your girlfriend is exactly the same but when you love someone you love any thing that they offer specially when it is comes to the wedding ring. Since when women choose the wedding ring , it is mostly a suprise from the man but the only thing she can complain about that if it is big or small size I mean small on her finger.
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Warning, Will Robinson! If she is not satisfied with the ring you picked out, you will not be able to satisfy her long term. Think a few times before marrying this young lady.
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Don't you know the saying Diamonds are a girls best friend?? Women are very picky because we love to show it off and u should love that to because shes showing everyone shes taken
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How fortunate she found out! Talk about a miracle. You wont have to hire a divorce lawyer to save your 401K. Consider it a gift from the gods. Instead of loving you and your ring she's pretentious and judgemental. She wants you in debt to start the marriage. Wave bye bye and run for the hills. You'll ultimately be very glad you did.
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